I still laptopless, but I’m a trooper and I won’t let it stop me from keeping track of my man vs beast rugby activities.

I’ve collated the scores that have been racked up by my handsome chaps and misshapen freaks, and I can now report that the pretty boys continue to lead the charge. Pretty Richard Kahui scored another couple of tries in his game against Japan, which certainly helped. Less helpful was Lazar’s yellow card in the game against Argentina: it cost the Handsome XV a point. Also unhelpful: injuries to Easter of England and Matfield of South Africa, preventing either of them from taking to the field or warming the bench. I shall continue to monitor their health and make substitutions later, should it prove to be necessary.

For the awkward boys, tries from Slade and Shane Williams helped to keep the score respectable, but once again the Unfortunate XV players were too comfortable on the bench – ten players from this team were in action, but only seven of them made their teams’ starting XV (whereas all ten of the Handsome XV players in action were on the field from the start).

Ugly coach Johnson continues to score for his team, but pretty coach Kirwan is yet to make a contribution.

Two things I realised over the weekend:

a) Stanhill, who plays for both the USA and the Handsome XV, has a mullet. This is a bit of a worry.

b) In my scoring system I neglected to acknowledge when each player actually sees victory on the field. To remedy this I’ve started giving a player one point if his team wins, and I’ve calculated these scores retrospectively.

So, as at 20 September the scores are:

Handsome XV: 74

Unfortunate XV: 67

It’s notable that the Unfortunate XV is yet to require any injury-related substitutions, but I guess their general lack of game time might help to explain it – or is it that God compensates for their lack of physical attractiveness by making them more rugged and sturdy?

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